Monday, February 25, 2008

Things I have learned...so far

I have just completed my year at age 40. (This is different than completing your 40th year. You do that at age 39). It was the hardest, depressing and yet rewarding years I have traveled to date. The twelve months included a farewell to thinking I was still physically young and a hello to mortality. I think the latter of those two was the harder part. (It was also the most rewarding part as well, but that's probably too deep and too long of a post for now). I've discussed this with one of my friends at work and we agree that people usually go through a period of self evaluation during their decade ages. (In other words we look back at age 20, 30, 40…). This is probably a good thing. Perhaps we should do it more often. So anyhow, I figured at age 40 I could impart some of the things I have learned so far and hopefully others will be better off for it.

  • I'm not nearly as good of a father as I thought I was. I've learned over the past year that things that I thought my kids really liked, well….they didn't. Just because your dad was vacant in my life doesn't mean I should hover in theirs. Don't get me wrong, they still love me, and they honor me well, especially on my birthday when I usually request and receive toys. :-)
  • Condominiums and Townhouses make more sense than ever! Let's just say I have a lot of bushes, and fairly large yard and Charlotte, NC gets pretty warm when grass and bushes grow.

  • It's not growing back. Despite hopes that it was a phase and I could somehow defy genetics, I believe I am losing the follicular battle. I will be wearing my hair short from here out whether I like it or not. The idea of wearing someone or something else's hair on my head or spreading chemicals on my scalp in hopes of some few additional sprouts is out of the question. The up side is that I no longer have to worry about having a comb either. :-)

  • I'm never going to have a washboard stomach. For the longest time, I thought with a little work and a healthy diet, I too, could have that "six-pack."Well thanks to Peyton Manning I now know this just isn't likely.A bit depressing, but I sure did enjoy that Brownie a la mode last night.



  • It's important to stretch…before everything! Young boys are known to pull the "Tom Cruise/Risky Business" slide across the floor while wearing socks. (NOTE: Cruise did this in just his underwear, but anyone who has seen the movie would know that he also lacked discretion in other things as well. Pants are recommended). Anyhow, if an older gentleman were to say, gather speed while going down a flight of steps with a hardwood floor landing and then lunge forward on the last step with his right leg extended to pull off the Cruise slide, he could perhaps pull a calf muscle. Now, I'm not certain about this, but this is what I heard. I also heard that the same muscle will stiffen up and ache every morning this person climbs out of bed as if to laugh at the increasing fragility that his 40 year old body has. But again, this is only what I've heard. Come to think of it, I don't know why any 40 year old would even think of trying to pull off a stunt like this.

Okay, that's enough for now. Lunch is over and I have to limp across campus.

1 comment:

Starling said...

HAHHAHAHA! That's a hilarious mental image....and also disturbing. Never blog about that again, please :)

I'm not laughing at you...I'm laughing with you, because I know my time is coming. I hope it's minus the bald bit, though. Dye is already in my semi-regular process...I'm currently Clairol Natural Instincts Nutmeg :) Darn that whole aging thing.